a blog is a blog is a blog

au revoir

2007-08-16T20:56:00.001-07:00

We've joined the blogger exodus.

http://familydavisross.typepad.com/blog/

love means...

2007-08-15T17:21:00.001-07:00

...taking one in the eye

Updates coming soon.

kwik-e-mart, eh?

2007-07-28T17:14:00.000-07:00

mmm...donuts

Kevin and Peter outside the Kwik-E-Mart

Yay! Mountain View is one of 11 cities with a 7-Eleven-turned-Kwik-E-Mart. You gotta love movie merchandising when it's this fun.

Despite the rumors of it being super crowded, we waited until a Saturday afternoon to go. Luckily, it was pretty empty when we arrived. (When we left, though, a line was forming at the door. I had to leave to get my wallet from the car, and then had to bribe the security guard to get back in.)

I was kind of surprised by how much had been changed in the store. Sure, the changes were all cosmetic: character cutouts, signs promoting the Kwik-E-Mart, donuts, squishees, Buzz Cola, and Krusty Os. But there was a lot more than we'd expected. Plus, you gotta love the exterior!

Peter stayed asleep the entire time we were there, which probably was nice as it allowed us to extend our stay. It also saved him from what surely would have been an entry in the Annals of Horrible, Terrible, No-Good Parenting, as I can envision myself giving Peter his first taste of Squishee. Oh, well, at least he can say he was there.

Tangent Thanks to this month's Backpacker, my interest in Glacier National Park has grown exponentially, leading to this conversation:

Amy: We should go to Glacier soon.
Kevin: I know, it will be melted soon.
Amy: I wonder if seeing a glacier will be something Peter can brag about. Like, in 65 years he can say (in old man voice): "I saw a glacier once, sonny."

Kwik-E-Mart

54 photos

who does this sh*t?

2007-07-26T22:55:00.000-07:00

Day 2 of single parenthood wasn't tough, exactly, but it did end on a kind of rough note.

So I was really looking forward to a bowl of ice cream. Sadly, I ate all of the Creme Brulee, but I remembered that we still had another container in the freezer.

Yeah. We had some. About three spoonfuls.

This is clearly Kevin's doing. If I saw this little ice cream left in the container, I'd finish it off.

Did I mention it's time to start the diet?

sigh...

2007-07-24T21:32:00.000-07:00

Just a few of the fun play options we have available!

Kevin's left for his first conference since BDR's arrival. Clever readers may realize that Kevin's absence means Peter and I are home, alone, together, for something like 90 hours straight. This will certainly be Very Tiring, but also Very Rewarding.

Tonight's lessons?

(1) It is really SO much easier to bathe a baby with four adult hands.
(2) Diapers have a purpose. Namely: keeping things clean. If you have a freshly-cleaned baby, it's probably wise to put a diaper on him pronto.
(3) Even if you want to get your dinner started, you can't really put the baby down an hour early. Because he won't go to sleep. And you'll just get frustrated. And no one wins. So, kick back, watch Dr. Phil, smile at the baby, and wait for him to smile back. You're in love with the booger, right?
(4) Then - eat dinner! Stop posting! Then, have some Ben and Jerry's Creme Brulee ice cream, because you're at home all alone and no one can stop you from eating straight from the pint. (Bonus points for doing this while watching Shaq's Big Challenge.)

(Note: I realized two weeks ago that I'll be going back to work at the end of August, and, unless I plan on wearing my okay-if-pregnant-but-kind-of-ugly-if-just-post-pregnant maternity clothes, I need to start dropping some of this baby weight. I was kind of hoping the Breastfeeding Fairy would come and take these extra pounds away, but she seems to be held up in customs or something. So...the diet must start. Sigh. I was really getting used to dessert three times a day, too.)

little reader

2007-07-23T21:47:00.000-07:00

It looks like our love of reading might have been passed to the next generation...

Peter loves his Hearts and Stars book (and his Spots and Dots as well). He'll look at these pages for what seems like an eternity for a baby.

matchy-matchy

2007-07-22T16:45:00.001-07:00

Kevin and Peter rocked their semi-matching Carolina pride yesterday.

Davis Family Adventure: The Conclusion

2007-07-21T14:22:00.000-07:00

My parents left very early yesterday morning for their flight back to Indiana. Whew! (That's for my father, who told me I was free to blog about how "relieved" we were that they were gone.)

But seriously - whew! We did a ton with them during their two weeks home. Yesterday was spent in recovery: both Peter and I were power nappers, and Kevin pulled out the Battlestar Galactica, a sure sign that nothing of consequence will be accomplished on a well-deserved lazy Saturday.

It was nice they could spend so much time here, because they were able to see just how much Peter changes daily. And, in a few weeks, they'll get to see him again as we visit Indiana.

Until then, some memories of the last week of their trip:

Mission San Juan Bautista
The largest of California's 21 missions, and site of Hitchcock's Vertigo. It was pretty cool, if only for the crazy statue of John the Baptist outside.

Peter's Opinion: Nice, because it was mostly inside or in the shade. Plus, it was only a short car ride - always a plus! Thee out of four Pampers.

Locusts and wild honey, indeed! SJB's looking a little too much like a Calvin Klein model here.

Old Town Sacramento
It looks old, but it's full of all kinds of modern treats, like taffy and ice cream. As Kevin said, "I didn't expect it to be full of stores, but they're the kind of stores I like - candy stores and joke shops."

Peter's Opinion: Kind of a far drive, and a little sunny for me to enjoy it fully. Plus. there were too many loud trains. (This is true: the loudest Kevin and I have ever heard Peter cry, aside from those times when he received a shot, was when a train chugged past us and unexpectedly blew its whistle. It was pretty heartbreaking how upset the little dude was.) Two out of four Pampers.

The Uncle Sam Handshake Rater told me that I'm an "expert on everything." Damn straight.

Taffy, taffy everywhere...but it's all dolphin free (??).

Jelly Belly Factory
So, yeah, we've been here before, but it was on the way, the baby needed a diaper change, my father wanted to collect the "elongated coin" found inside, and Kevin and I knew that it serves Blue Bunny ice cream. And we love that Blue Bunny ice cream! This is how we came to enjoy ice cream before 11 a.m.
Peter's Opinion: Love those bathrooms! Four out of four Pampers.

For the record: Birthday cake and cotton candy ice cream goes down really easy at 10:37 a.m.
Also note: Kevin's watch is 5 minutes fast.

Egyptian Museum
Pretty interesting, even if we all were exhausted! Peter's Opinion: I was very, very quiet. Three out of four Pampers.

A probabilist's work is never done.

Mission San Juan Bautista

Jelly Belly Factory

Old Town Sacramento

Egyptian Museum

Sicko made me feel oh-so-sick

2007-07-20T17:21:00.000-07:00

Last night Kevin and I took advantage of yet more free babysitting and saw Sicko. A few comments:

(1) Kevin now is fully on the moving to Toronto boat. Now, we just have to pray for a job opening.
(2) The birthing rooms at the NHS hospitals in Britain are really pretty sweet. I saw a ball and a hammock, and who knows what other devices were tucked away.
(3) Just when you think postpartum emotions have stabilized, you find yourself with tears dripping down your faces. I hope this will end, soon, because it's getting a little old.
(4) Did I mention Kevin's down with moving to Toronto? Just checking.
(5) See, the good thing about moving to Toronto is that we can ensure our children will have very little chance of thinking that dropping off uninsured sick people at a homeless shelter is okay. I'm not really sure how we, as a country, have sanctioned such heartlessness as perfectly fine.
(6) And we say we live in a "Christian country" with "family values."
(7) Kevin adds, "the thing about the taxes that I told you." Which is: Michael Moore should have taken a cue from political science professor and not-so-secret socialist John Stephens and shown that there is very little difference in disposable income between a country like Sweden, which provides a TON of social benefits via taxes and redistribution, and the United States. (Sure, the United States does provide some social benefits - Social Security Administration, anyone? - but who really relies on these benefits? Would you say, "well, I'm unemployed, but at least I get Medicaid!")
(8) Kevin also adds, "we'll move to Toronto."
(9) And, a bit of irony:

pyschic powers at work

2007-07-20T17:04:00.000-07:00

For a while I've harbored a suspicion I'm somewhat psychic. Kevin and I often say that I "know things." Usually, these "things" are pretty lame.

Here's one that's not so lame:

During Peter's early morning feeding, I had the sudden realization that the photos hanging over his bassinet would be pretty dangerous in the event of an earthquake. I never really think about earthquakes, even though there is at least one a month out here. (It might be different if I'd actually ever felt one.) Earthquake safety has never, not once, figured into my thought process.

Potential deathtrap.

A few hours later, while talking with my parents, I learned that there was yet another earthquake in the bay area, this one near Oakland.

What's amazing about this? My thoughts about earthquake safety took place at almost exactly the same time as the earthquake.

Transformers

2007-07-16T23:38:00.000-07:00

Taking advantage of free babysitting, Kevin and I saw the Transformers tonight. (We arrived at the Transformers after realizing that it was theonlysinglemovie being shown between 8 and 9 p.m.)

So, while movies such as the Transformers clearly do not stand up to plot scrutiny, we did have these comments and questions:

(1) Why couldn't Megatron kill Shia LaBeouf? Really, if I were a giant alien robot, I'd hope I could take out little Louis Stevens.

(2) I can make a case for why the Transformers needed to transform into the first automobile they see...but why can't they re-transform after? I mean, wouldn't Optimus Prime want to be something a little more agile than a big rig?

(3) Why do I suddenly want to buy a Camaro? And drink a Mountain Dew? And call on Deloitte & Touche for all of my accounting needs?

When the movie didn't feel like a really long GM commercial, it was pretty fun. It was kind of cool to see the robots blowing up stuff. Kevin and I alternated between almost having seizures (due to the non-stop frenetic activity) and enjoying the ride.

Really, it's a lot better than the other Transformers movie, which Kevin rented from Netflix a few months ago. I suspect that it could only have been enjoyed under the influence of mind-altering substances. It's telling that the first Transformers movie reminded me a lot of 2001: A Space Odyssey.

gratuitous baby pictures

2007-07-16T23:36:00.000-07:00

adventures

2007-07-15T23:37:00.000-07:00

The Davis Family Adventure continues, with trips to:

Big Sur

Big Sur

11 photos

Monterey Bay Aquarium

22 photos

Alcatraz Island

Alcatraz

26 photos

Stanford

12 photos

My sister left this morning, but my parents will remain for another week. The non-stop momentum of their visit will wane now that my sister is gone, which is a bit of a relief since it's exhausting to be on vacation with a newborn. (Especially since Kevin's needed to work most of the past week.)

tall trees and a tiny baby

2007-07-09T00:27:00.000-07:00

The Davis Family Adventure began in earnest today, as we trekked across the Golden Gate Bridge to Muir Woods National Monument and Stinson Beach.

We saw some tall trees, some beautiful beaches, and dressed our baby in a truly ridiculous manner.

My mother patiently waits for us.

Did you know Peter is half reptile?

Kimberly and me.

Kevin and I decided that we'll never, ever, ever, ever try to go north of San Francisco on a summer weekend, even if there were a free festival of all-you-can-eat ice cream and cotton candy and popcorn and a dance party featuring all of our favorite bands and professional athletes. The drive is..."needlessly painful" is perhaps the most charitable way I can describe it.

Davis Family Adventure

29 photos | Edit

a good reason to declare bankruptcy

2007-07-06T20:07:00.000-07:00

As related by Kevin's officemate:

Apparently, there once was a student from "one of those European countries" who, upon coming to Stanford, decided not to get the employee insurance. Why would he need to? He's getting it from his country, right?

And his wife became pregnant.

And they delivered.

And they got the bill.

And they realized, with what I can only imagine is bone-chilling terror, that their national health insurance didn't cover babies.

So, they did what any good American would do: declare bankruptcy and return to the Motherland.

Again: how does one possibly give birth in this country without health insurance?

TV Tuesday

2007-07-03T23:09:00.000-07:00

This is the Hopen. Using the verb "to hope" write your own dirty joke.

It was going to be drive-in Tuesday, but someone didn't want to drive all the way to the dodgy part of San Jose to see Ratatouille. So, we watched:

The Ringer.
(1) How do movies like this get made? Really.
(2) The Special Olympics dorms have the same bed that KJ and I have. (Kevin: "I thought it looked familiar.")
(3) Kevin: "I thought The Ringer was pretty good, though. I mean, didn't you think it had a good message?"
(4) I also thought The Ringer had a good message, but was curious about:
(a) Why were the Special Olympics on TV? and
(b) Why didn't anyone say, "hey, that kid was state champ?"

Shaq's Big Challenge.
(1) The love affair continues. Sigh. I heart Shaq.
(2) I also really love how seemingly unselfconscious these kids are. They are, for lack of a better word, very kidlike. Like, for example, how they really don't seem to realize that all of those video cameras recording their every move might show how they're slacking on their exercise routine. Or eating four slices of pizza in one sitting.

let's hear it for sleep-deprived conversations

2007-07-01T21:57:00.000-07:00

a very true conversation, around 4 a.m.

Amy: Can you put the baby back to sleep?
Kevin: Where is he?
Amy: Hmm. He's in the stroller.
Kevin: What?
Amy: Oh. The bassinet.

Note: The baby was asleep.

one-bee baby

2007-06-29T17:25:00.001-07:00

Peter may love Busy Bee #1, but he punches the lights out of Busy Bee #2 (a.k.a. the Deuce).

Our baby's a monogamous lover, all right.

(note: Peter does enjoy a kiss or two from Monterey, but don't tell the Bee)

porn star

2007-06-29T17:15:00.000-07:00

We caught Peter full-on tongue kissing with Busy Bee* yesterday.

Before we filmed this bit of PG-13 video, Peter gave Kevin a long, serious stare-down, as if to say: can't a baby get a moment of privacy in this place?

*Note: After Peter's make-out session, Busy Bee went from being "he" to "she."

hooray for smiles!

2007-06-28T17:41:00.000-07:00

da bomb

2007-06-26T23:37:00.000-07:00

Apparently, Thursday is National Bomb Pop Day.

I know this because I am on the Blue Bunny Ice Cream email list. Do me a favor: if you live in a state or city that actually sells Blue Bunny Ice Cream, go out and eat some. It's delicious, and, sadly, unavailable here.

Anyway, I plan to eat a few dozen Bomb Pops in celebration of Bomb Pop Day, but even I will halt in the face of these recipes (also supplied by BBIC):

Bomb Pop marinated shrimp;
Bomp Pop fried shrimp;
Bomp Pop marinated sole;
Bomp Pop spicy chicken wings.

Eew. I mean, I guess the salient flavor of a Bomb Pop is "sweet," but still...

shaq-tastic

2007-06-26T22:59:00.001-07:00

Disclaimer: I am in love with Shaquille O'Neal - recall my desire to call BDR "Shaquila O'Neala." I love his giantness, I love his attitude, I love the fact that he his bed is 30 feet by 15 feet. I love the fact that he seems like a genuinely good person - getting his BA to please his mother, and then getting an (albeit fake University of Phoenix) MBA, and being a semi-kind-of police officer. I admit I've never seen Kazaam, nor have I ever listened to Shaq Fu: Da Return, but I'm sure even these wouldn't deter my love.

Plus, he's kind of good at basketball.

I don't understand why people don't like Shaq's Big Challenge. It's certainly the best thing I've seen on network TV in the past few months, and, as far as I can tell, the premise is pretty solid: there are lots of fat kids, fat kids are unhealthy and unhappy, and we should do more to make fat kids into skinny kids.

It seems the dissent comes in two forms: first, Shaq's kind of a porker himself. True enough, but he's also a professional athlete who can actually run up and down the court. I'd be more skeptical about the athleticism of fat athletes if I didn't see Charles Barkely tear up the court in a race with Dick Bavetta during last year's All Star game or the 1993 Phillies (who might not be the best example, as they didn't exactly win, but they were fat). All I know is that Shaq can make a basket over some kid's house, while I can't even make any shot from any distance, and that has to count for something. (About $100 million, if I'm not mistaken.)

The second problem people seem to have with the show is...well, that it calls some kids fat. But really, these kids are fat, and to imagine they think otherwise is ridiculous. I'm not entirely sure what the risk is of telling obese children that they need help (that is, they need to go on a diet and exercise), but our country really has a problem doing it. Is the fear that the obesity epidemic will flip to an anorexia epidemic? And is that really a valid fear?

Blame McDonalds and Hostess, not Shaq, for childhood obesity.

Anyway, the show is pretty much awesome. It shows Shaq as both this total dork who uses the same hit-my-hand-on-the-top-of-the-door-frame-and-pretend-I-hit-my-head trick over and over, who uses his fame (and size) to intimidate local bullies into leaving one of his fat kids alone, and who admits to being a sucker Dad to his kids.

In my dream world, there is a show of 8 to 10 minute clips of crazy but charismatic athletes - guys like Shaq or Charles Barkley or George Foreman - just doing normal stuff. Or complaining. My favorite part of any basketball game on TNT is when Charles Barkley starts getting cranky. Oh, well. I just have to hope ABC won't cancel this, because I'm really not sure what else I could possibly watch.

I got knocked up too

2007-06-26T00:09:00.001-07:00

While Kevin's parents were here, we took advantage of the free babysitting and saw Knocked Up.

The movie itself was fine - I particularly liked the idea of the little girl Googling "murder" - but not as funny as I'd been led to believe.

Mostly, I found myself surprised by a few things - like, I really miss being pregnant. Specifically, I miss having BDR safely ensconced within the womb. Sure, I didn't really know BDR then, but he was always safe and always with me.

Also, I was very unprepared for my emotional reaction to the birth at the end of the movie. Luckily, there are only a few minutes of movie after the big birth scene, or otherwise I'd have needed to leave the theater early. Seriously: tears, on the verge of sobbing, partly for the memories of birth, mostly for the missing of my child. And I should note that I've not had post-partum crying since the middle of May.

Oh, well. I'm not saying we should have seen Evan Almighty or anything (does anyone else think Steve Carell is the next Jim Carrey? and I mean this in a bad way.), but I do think it might have been a little too soon.

At least the popcorn had real butter.

the crap I read

2007-06-25T23:38:00.001-07:00

Does anyone remember this really terrible MTV show The Blame Game? All I really remember about it was that the point of the show was to prove who was responsible for a couple's break-up. In one segment the couple had a chance to air embarrassing dirty laundry about each other, and the accused could either deny the embarrassing facts, or he could admit to it, by hitting a button and saying, "I admit it." Any time I'm about to admit something embarrassing about myself, I often think of this - and, in my head, I'm slapping an imaginary button and proudly admitting something embarrassing...

...like all of the above. See, the thing is, I had a LOT of free time in college.

As much as I like to read the classics, the modern classics, and the should-be modern classics, I read a prodigious amount of crap as well. In the interest of full disclosure, I will admit to reading:

All of Jane Green's novels. Well, not the most recent one, but I just bought it at Target. In hardcover.

All of Sophie Kinsella's novels - including Shopaholic and Baby while pregnant.

Lots of crappy YA novels, including the following serials: Gossip Girl, The A List, The Clique, The Au Pairs, The It Girl, Private, The Insiders, Summer Boys, and Seven Deadly Sins. And probably more.

Lots of books with very pink covers, none of which qualify as romance novels, none of which qualify as literature. Books by people like Plum Sykes, Lauren Weisberger, and Emily Giffin. Next up? 24 Karat Kids.

Also, I'm kind of chomping at the bit to get my hands on Dedication, the new novel by the craptastic authors who brought us The Nanny Diaries and Citizen Girl. I read the book jacket and was very surprised to learn that the authors actually bothered to give their protagonist a NAME this time around.

I'm also really excited for Kristin Gore's sequel to Sammy's Hill; I devoured Sammy's Hill two summers ago while living in exile at the Gray's house, and have been looking forward to more from her ever since.

Jared and Cathy and reptile, too

2007-06-25T23:29:00.000-07:00

I've delayed posting about this mostly because I wanted to wait to get the picture for proof.

Last week, Jared and Cathy Silver, friends of mine from college (and, I admit it, high school...kind of) were in San Francisco on vacation, and they drove down to scenic Mountain View for a dinner date. We at at Pasta? on Castro Street, and were rewarded with this:

a dude and his reptile. I'm not sure what it is...an alligator? A Gila monster? Who knows, but it was pretty awesome.

2007-06-23T21:31:00.000-07:00

Peter always uses his saftey belt.

spoilage

2007-06-21T21:35:00.001-07:00

Since Peter's grandparents and aunt have arrived, he's enjoyed even more than usual time-in-arms. Which makes time-in-carseat that much more unbearable, and this is unfortunate, since we would like to do more than sit around the condo staring at the baby.

Gram and Pop and Peter.

A painful drive home from San Francisco.

Peter's new art

2007-06-21T21:32:00.000-07:00

For his Grandparent's visit, and for his first visit to San Francisco, Peter had a little cosmetic upgrade.

The package says these tattoos are "FDA and Mom approved!"

This was also Peter's first trip to a bar.

bonanza

2007-06-18T22:08:00.001-07:00

Peter says, "thanks for all the well-wishes and gifts!"

In many ways, having a baby is like winning the lottery. We've been so bombarded by the most thoughtful cards and the most generous presents that the UPS man knows Peter Joseph by name.

Today, though, we received perhaps the most...interesting card, in a gift from Uncle Kari.

On a sheet of white computer paper, a simple message: congrats on l'il Peter Joseph.

On the other side of the computer paper? This story: Woman jailed for testicle attack.

This might be just the inspiration I needed to actually start a baby book.

err...try the $63,000 baby

2007-06-18T21:59:00.000-07:00

Our lack of national health care makes our little socialist go cross-eyed.

So it turns out that it was just $17,000 to bring Chompy McChomps into the world, and then another $46,000 to sustain him for three days.

Yowza!

Kevin's concern, once opening our most recent insurance statement, was whether or not we'd have to pay $500 instead of the $250 we'd anticipated, hinting that it might be a "rip-off" should we have to pay the extra $250. He may be kidding. He probably isn't.

I only mention this because it seems that, really, if we didn't have health insurance we probably wouldn't have had a baby. Or, we would follow the increasingly attractive option of moving to Canada.

Required Reading #10 & #11: A Maile Meloy entry

2007-06-13T10:57:00.000-07:00

Maile Meloy (yes, Colin Meloy's sister), has written two books (Liars and Saints and A Family Daughter) that were really clever in their ability to reinvent what an author can do with the tale of one family.

Liars and Saints

I devoured the first, Liars and Saints, during the last month of my pregnancy. At this time in my life (and now, really), my measure of a good book was how long I would be willing to stay awake to read it. (Or, similarly, how willing I would be to forgo a nap in order to read it.) For Liars and Saints, I was willing to do both.

It's not a remarkable story - a bit dramatic, a bit tragi-comic, and a bit romantic for my tastes - but it's really well told. It's about a family, and how that family evolves over two generations, and then loops back over on itself as a niece and her uncle fall in love, make love, and make a baby. Luckily, he's not really her uncle, but her cousin, which apparently makes it all that much better.

(For me, I'm not convinced that my personal sense of guilt and weirdness would be assuaged if I found out that I'd been procreating with my cousin and not my uncle, but when I posed the question to Kevin yesterday, he concurred with the characters - it's all that much better to get it on with your cousin rather than your uncle. As Kevin pointed out, "your uncle would be too much like your parents." And, really, it's far to generous to think that these novels have any Oedipal or Electra allusions.)

A Family Daughter

When I started this book a few days ago, I immediately was confused. Same character names, mostly same character characteristics, but some significant differences. For example, one character was tragically childless in Liars and Saints, and had two children in A Family Daughter. Question mark? Yes. I immediately suspected my 8-months-pregnant brain was responsible for my faulty memory of the the first book, even though I'd really just read it.

Then, I realized what was happening: Liars and Saints was a novel written by a character in A Family Daughter. Thus, creative differences between the two. The same insanity and drama
ensues, with some additional drama thrown in - let's hear it for Hungarian orphans purchased by Russians for prostitution who have affairs with French diplomats, who sell illegitimate offspring to wealthy Alzheimer-ailing French heiresses living in obscurity in Argentina, who is told the child is delivered to her via a European princess's interest in Romanian orphans. Whew, indeed. And that's only a small subplot!

It should be noted that in A Family Daughter, the niece and uncle who have an affair are really niece and uncle. Sorry, charlie - no hidden pregnancies which make them cousins in this tale! Luckily, no children either.

Unlike many other creative-types - Monet's million water lilies come to mind, or Pollack's splatter paintings - authors are limited in their ability to reinvent the same material. Without resorting to sequels, how can an author use a creative conceit to its fullest? I enjoyed these books because the offer one clever suggestion.

That, and they were easy to read.

Kevin faces 32 with a grin

2007-06-12T15:07:00.000-07:00

the $17,000 baby

2007-06-12T14:56:00.000-07:00

Hey, I'm worth almost every penny!

We received our hospital bill yesterday. Thank God for health insurance.

El Corte de Madera Creek OSP, redux

2007-06-10T13:44:00.000-07:00

Editor's note: Kevin has pointed out that I'm supposed to be the optimistic one in this relationship, but this post was surprisingly negative. So, to clarify: when I say "diminished our ability to enjoy this hike," I mean "reduced" or "lessened," and not "eliminated" or "removed all enjoyment from." The fact is, though, it was buggier and hotter than when we first visited, suggesting that it's more of an early-spring park than an early-summer park.

Peter and I investigate some redwood stumps.

We revisited ECdMC this weekend, after realizing that the drive to our first choice (Purisima Creek Redwoods OSP) was a bit long and winding for some stomachs to handle. (Plus, we'd thought about a seven-mile hike, which would have been really interesting. And not in a good way.)

You may remember the crazy family, and the tafoni sandstone formation, from previous posts.

We chose this alternate trip after remembering the trail as easy, although as we started Kevin had a change of heart:

Kevin: I thought you had trouble on this trail. Toward the end you were struggling.
Amy: Kevin. (Pause.) I was seven months pregnant. And having contractions.
Kevin: Oh, yeah.

The hike was nice, but two things diminished our ability to enjoy it:
- the hot weather;
- the bugs, including, but not limited to, mosquitoes.

Really, if this is what a Bay Area summer is like, why not move back to NC? Oh, yeah...the humidity.

El Corte de Madera Creek OSP

17 photos

just like sweet tarts

2007-06-07T15:07:00.000-07:00

This might be the most singularly delicious food product I've had in the past two months: Acai Pomegranate Wildwood Foods Organic Soyogurt Smoothie.

It tastes so scarily like Sweet Tarts, I even made Kevin try it. Kevin, no fan of the texture of a soy drink, was reluctant to try it. He conceded it was "tasty," but also reminded me that he'd have "texture issues" with drinking any more of it.

sunset

2007-06-05T11:40:00.000-07:00

Last night's sunset was pretty nice, especially from 50 feet up.

so many ripples

2007-06-05T11:38:00.000-07:00

Peter's a bit...er...zaftig.

..

Monte Bello Open Space Preserve

2007-06-02T16:00:00.000-07:00

It's like the Bjorn was made for mountain lion attacks!

We returned to the trekking life today, after our recent success with the Bjorn. Our destination? Monte Bello Open Space Preserve, chosen because of its proximity and its promise of some shade.

Well, we could have used more shade, and it is close - though, it requires driving on a queasily-curvy road to get there.

But, a hike we did take! It was a relatively easy 3-mile loop, with just a few hundred feet of elevation gain, but probably exactly what we needed. Let's just say that Peter might be the most in shape of all of us.

In a patch of shade, and very happy to be outside again.

Monte Bello Open Space Preserve

16 photos

ducks, all grown up

2007-05-31T19:12:00.000-07:00

Seriously, the only thing that grows this quickly are weeds and Baby Davis-Ross.

lunch with the Bishop

2007-05-31T18:44:00.001-07:00

As reward for our good work, Kevin and I were invited to have lunch with the Bishop today. At his house. Which looks like this:

It is seriously one of the nicest houses we've seen in the area, with the largest yard to boot. So why are we trying to raise $100 million?

Anyway, the lunch was quite nice. And we got bags of candy at the end, which always plays well with this crowd. Curiously, though, in the midst of peppermints and Werther's Originals, was this little piece of sweetness:

I really like the image of the Bishop going out and picking up a bunch of gummy SpongeBob candies. (I really enjoyed eating it, too.)

Required Reading #9: Ice Haven

2007-05-30T15:21:00.000-07:00

Let's hear it for the Mountain View Public Library, who are starting to carry a great array of graphic novels. I've avoided reading this one, mostly because I couldn't justify the price for the quantity of content, but I'm glad that I was able to get it for free - it's fantastic.

I'll be brief in description (since the book is brief in itself) and suggest that it's Daniel Clowes's homage to Sherwood Anderson's Winesburg, Ohio. That is: a portrait of a town, with all of its dysfunction, for us all to enjoy.

What's perhaps most remarkable about this novel is that each character believes himself to be at the pinnacle (or, I suppose, depth) of despair, only to learn that actually others are much more pathetic than himself. Indeed, the most pathetic character (Random Walker) is perhaps the only character who fails to view himself as such.

Did I like this book? Let's just say I dug out my I-make-you-go-blind tiny book lamp to read this last night, while baby Peter and Kevin softly snored next to me. (Of course, I compensated by taking a nap today. But. I gave up sleep to read this.)

yum-a-la, yum-a-la, yum-a-la

2007-05-30T15:19:00.001-07:00

I risked the happiness of my son to purchase this: Breyers Fried Ice Cream flavored ice cream.

It was worth it.

Plus, it's allegedly "light" ice cream. Score!

dirty crosswalk man

2007-05-29T17:32:00.000-07:00

On Castro Street, in Mountain View.

reading list

2007-05-29T17:21:00.000-07:00

What's lamer? The fact that these are now the books I check out of the library, or the fact that I'll not even have the chance to read them.

dvd town 3 - now with a side of DVR

2007-05-28T17:38:00.000-07:00

So, about the only thing you can do with a newborn who likes to eat and sleep and be held all day is watch television. I've tried alternatives - like reading a book, or knitting - but unless I develop a third and fourth hand, that's just not going to happen.

Plus, let's be honest: my attention span has collapsed, in part from sleep deprivation and in part from constant attention to a baby that might be on the verge of a freak-out. I can barely handle reading Newsweek, let alone a novel.

So...television it is. Which is terribly embarrassing as Kevin and I had agreed to a TV-free world for Peter's first two years; we've since amended it to TV-free once he actually seems to pay attention to the screen.

In a serendipitous turn of events, we're mysteriously getting super-extended cable again. (Actually, it's not so mysterious, but entirely related to the cable meltdown of a few weeks ago.) Which means hours and hours of DVRed movies.

A few hits and misses:

28 and 35 Up

These two entries continue the stories of the cute British kids who (for the most part) grow up to be remarkably normal and boring British adults. I confess to being a fan of Nick, the cute farm-boy-turned-nuclear-physicist; Bruce, the sensitive mathematics teacher; and Tony, who very prophetically said at 14 what his life would be: he'd be a jockey, but, if he weren't successful, he'd be a cabbie.

We all were much cuter 14 years ago.

It's a bit tiresome to watch the archival footage from previous years with each episode, but I suppose it's useful given these documentaries were released seven years apart. In some weird way, it's like attending a high school reunion. (Point of fact: I have never attended a high school reunion, and I doubt I will. But I can imagine.)

Little Children

"Mmm...sexy naked Kate Winslet." - Kevin Ross, movie critic

Kevin's no Pauline Kael (or Roger Ebert, for that matter), but he does hit the nail on the head: much of this movie rests on the shoulders of sexy naked Kate Winslet.

Kate Winslet gets much naked-er in the movie.

Both Kevin and I had read the book a few years ago, while on vacation, and we both agreed that while the movie was nice, the book was much better. In fact, the only thing the movie had going for it was - all together now - sexy naked Kate Winslet.

In fact, the only other difference offered in the movie version of this story (other than, of course, sexy naked Kate Winslet) was the newly-appropriate conversation Kevin and I had regarding which of us were more likely to be a character in the movie: me, as bored housewife and mother (although not nearly as sexy or naked as Kate Winslet), or Kevin, as bored stay-at-home dad with failed career.

The Family Stone

Preface: the ONLY reason we watched this movie is because it didn't demand our attention. The plot was as transparent as a piece of Scotch tape, which is useful when watching a movie during your infant son's witching hour.

What the @*$?

Seriously.

In what sicko, perverted family would such wife-swapping be okay, let alone joyfully celebrated? Yick, yock, yuck.

And while love at first sight is a nice plot device, it demands something more than a quick glance and a short conversation for the audience to buy it. Otherwise, it reads a lot more like lust at first sight - which is probably a much more efficacious, if less noble, plot device.

In fact, the only interesting part of this movie was Kevin's outraged response, which included many "what the @*$@?" and "are we supposed to believe this *$(#*@?"

In conclusion, "it sucked." - Kevin Ross, movie critic.

Volver

Who knows? We had to return it, since we realized that watching anything with subtitles would be out of the question for the next few months.

Half Moon Bay

2007-05-24T19:28:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, we took my mother and our baby to Half Moon Bay.

Fish was eaten by some; fun was had by all.

Half Moon Bay

stress test

2007-05-24T18:03:00.000-07:00

Castro Street's own Scientology Information Center.

We live remarkably close to a Scientology reading room, and we find ourselves walking past it frequently.

More often than not there's a dude outside asking us if we'd like to take a stress test. He's always very polite when he asks, and we're always very polite when we decline. My goal, after encountering him several times, is to show him just how unstressed and happy I could be without his alien-based religion.

On Tuesday, Kevin, Peter and I walked past said Scientology dude. He offered us only a familiar "hello," which we returned in kind.

Have we won? Perhaps. But consider this: I'm certainly more stressed now that we have an infant than I've ever been. So, maybe we've all just lost.

important life lessons the Lost season finale taught me

2007-05-24T17:51:00.000-07:00

This is about as realistic as Jack's future beard looked.

(1) If you ever survive a plane crash, you may get something called a "gold pass" that allows you to have free flights for life.
(2) Always let the plucky fat man help out, because he's actually quite helpful.
(3) One-eyed Russians are almost impossible to kill.
(4) Don't even try to put on a fake beard and mustache, because it will be painfully obvious to all.

worst. endings. ever.

2007-05-22T18:11:00.000-07:00

Part 1: 24

Please point that somewhere else, I'm too busy yawning.

Look, people who make 24, I suffered through your barely palatable season with very few complaints, but I cannot abide by your season finale. Lame, lame, lame. Who cares? Unless you:
(1) Told me that Josh Bauer was indeed Jack Bauer's son, as we all know his is;
(2) Killed Audrey Raines, because she is bor-ing;
(3) Finally resolved Agent Doyle's vaguely evil status.
(4) Is Wayne Palmer dead? Seriously. He might be. Why not a check-in with the President?

Although, some credit:
(1) Chloe as a mother could be entertaining. Certainly pregnant Chloe could be hilarous.
(2) Ricky Schroder's amazing acting chops. (And if you want to know way more than anyone ought to about why he's Ricky again, check this out.)

Part 2: Heroes

Hiro the Hero

So I'll avoid highlighting some of the more obvious plot holes (like, why were people so concerned with keeping the invincible cheerleader safe? and why did Nathan have to escort Peter Petrelli to his atomic explosion - why couldn't Peter fly himself? and why could a well-positioned bullet kill Peter Petrelli but not his atomic explosion?) What makes Heroes finale so dumb is that the whole season was building to this episode and it turned out to be so lame. "OK, I'm Peter Petrelli with lots of cool superpowers at my disposal. I'm facing my archenemy in a fight to save millions of people. What should I do? Oh yeah, I'll just punch Sylar in the stomach a few times. That should do it." This supposedly epic showdown was just so dull. And the "connections"? What was Mica's job - to make sure they could use the elevator? So that Nikki could hit Sylar with a parking meter? And why isn't Mohinder - i.e. the worst character & actor on TV - dead yet? Lame.

Lost better be good.

the not-so-baby ducks

2007-05-21T13:49:00.000-07:00

Probably the last baby duck post, since they're growing up so fast:

They've been hanging out by our back porch quite a bit, but Peter's aversion to anything other than being held while in bed or on the futon makes visiting the ducks somewhat difficult.

Human Giant

2007-05-15T19:30:00.000-07:00

Oh, I love Human Giant. It might be the funniest thing I've seen in a while. Maybe it's Lil' 9/11, maybe it's terms like "child arsonist," or maybe it's the deer that pushes strollers into oncoming traffic.

Plus, any show that gets cameos from Ted Leo and Devandra Banhart (and plays some Iron and Wine along the way) has to be pretty solid.

babies, babies all around

2007-05-14T19:46:00.000-07:00

I'll try to minimize the over-baby-posting, but I should note that

the baby ducks are back!

And Baby Davis-Ross is one week old.

2007-05-11T17:16:00.000-07:00

Luckily, this isn't a face we see often.

Sleep Log (Cumulative since May 9): 8 hours.

Who's in Amy's Belly Round 5: Peter Joseph Davis-Ross

2007-05-09T16:34:00.000-07:00

BDR = Peter Joseph Davis-Ross

His stats:
Born: 5:53 a.m. on Monday, May 7
Weight: 8 pounds, 10 ounces
Length: 21 inches

Peter's doing great now, but he had a rough start to life. Toward the end of labor, he became a little stressed out, which caused him to have a bowel movement. Unfortunately, he then inhaled some of that bowel movement...which is just as terrible as it sounds. He couldn't recover his breath after being born, so he was whisked away to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. This was tough, since I only got to "hold" him for 10 seconds or so, and Kevin not at all.

But, he's doing GREAT now. Both Peter and I were discharged today, and our instructions are to treat him as a well baby.

Peter's already bored with Dad's stories.

You can read a ton more about Peter's first days, if you so desire, here.

And, of course, a gagillion pictures.

Hello, Peter

56 photos

Uncle Dean

2007-05-04T18:10:00.000-07:00

In a break from all of this duck posting...

This rather stern picture of Dean Smith has been staring me down from our desktop for about a week.

I think he's saying, "BDR, get your bottom in motion. Uncle Dean wants to run some drills."

Now, back to the ducks:

Earlier in the week, Kevin and I watched in horror as a hawk tried to eat the baby ducks. So, it was cool that for a few minutes the hawk decided his kill-perch would be right outside of our back door, but it was kind of sad to see all of the adult ducks freaking out and flying around.

quacky, redux

2007-05-02T18:45:00.000-07:00

The baby ducks are possibly my most favorite thing, ever. They're just 10 feet outside our back door, and I really have to restrain myself from reaching out a picking one up whenver they swim by.

The quacktasticness of Mother Duck:

quacky

2007-05-01T09:06:00.000-07:00

For the past few days, KJ and I have been trying to figure out why the ducks on the pond outside have been freaking out. By "freaking out," I mean, "quacking incessantly for 15 to 20 minutes at a time."

Yesterday, we figured out why:

yum

2007-04-29T18:34:00.000-07:00

vanilla ice cream + chocolate cake + a lot of frosting = delicious popcicles

thank you, IKEA, for your $2 popcicle molds

required reading?

2007-04-29T18:27:00.000-07:00

Not really. Along with craft ADD, I've had reading ADD - I've not really been able to read anything longer than a magazine article for a while.

So, I thought I'd give myself a challenge with some chick-lit, and checked out The Jane Austen Book Club from the library.

It's pretty terrible, but I do enjoy this line:

"Now, often as not, when she thought of whist, sex came also to mind."

Hmm. I always thought the link was between a barouche and sex, since it always seemed that Austen's women went for ill-supervised carriage rides just before receiving a marriage proposal.

Kevin Ross, Mr. Non-Sequitur

2007-04-29T18:13:00.000-07:00

I spend a lot of time listening to Kevin's musings on the world. Lately he's been a bit...punchy. Like this extended discussion about Barak Obama's dental health:

"Barak Obama's always chewing gum. Doesn't he always look like he's chewing gum? Or is that just him talking?" Pause. Then: "See? Doesn't he look like he's chewing gum?"

digital cable...dead

2007-04-29T16:34:00.000-07:00

Dear Comcast,

I understand that you're a really big company with a lot to do.

But, you see, my cable has been nonfunctioning since Wednesday night.

And while I don't really care so much, I do kind of pay a lot for this service.

Plus, I have to keep my cable box like THIS until you figure out what's wrong.

As you can see, this is kind of lame. Please advise.

Signed,

Little Girl

unfortunately...

2007-04-24T23:05:00.000-07:00

Argh! A Series of Unfortunate Events is being released in paperback, but with extras, including an advice column titled "What shall I do, Lemony Snicket?" and something equally delicious sounding in the "Spoily Brats" comic.

Plus, check out the pulpish cover art!

My sense of frugality is battling my sense of Snicket-love, and I think I'm the only one who's losing.

more mail mysteries

2007-04-22T14:21:00.000-07:00

I can understand why we get mail like this:But I can't fathom why we get this:
And I should note that both contain exactly the same update from a fundraising committee we're a part of. It kind of makes me wonder about its efficiency.

dvd town 2

2007-04-22T08:27:00.000-07:00

loudQUIETloud: A film about the Pixies

It should be called: the somewhat disappointing film about how many ex-Pixies realized (a) they need money and (b) people still want to see them, leading to conclusion (c) let's get back on tour.
(A tour that I totally would have supported, had I not been with my darling husband hiking the Sierra when they trod through NC.)

As far as music documentaries go, this was kind of weak. I think End of the Century was much more interesting. I kind of think even DiG! was more interesting. Perhaps the Pixies' entertainment value was hampered by the emphasis on sobriety. Perhaps it was hampered by the fact that so little of the film featured the music. For whatever reason, it merits a "meh."

Our comments:
(1) Kevin: Kim and Kelley Deal should have their own reality show. They're hilarious.*
(2) Amy: I wish Frank Black would keep his shirt on.**

* They really were.
** Seriously, 75 percent of the non-concert footage of Black Francis a.k.a. Frank Black a.k.a. Charles Thompson showed him stripped to his shorts, usually sprawled out on some hotel bed. Ugh.

Seven-Up! and Seven Plus Seven

These are the first two documentaries in the British "Up" series, and they are both informative and hilarious.

So the premise is that the director selected 14 seven-year-old kids in 1964, and he will follow them to see what the future "bankers and shop stewards" of Britain will be. As we hear often in the documentary, "give me a child until he is seven, and I will give you the man."

The kids are pretty adorable when they are seven - most are unabashedly precocious, while others are painfully shy. There are lots of little prep-school boys - the type who sing "Waltzing Matilda" in Latin - and a few public-school punks as well.

At fourteen, the kids are less adorable. They're actually a bit more painful; a few of the children are so awkward and so shy that they can barely look at the camera. (I think Neil and Suzy should get it on. They might be each other's only chance.) And, a few of the kids are much more punkish this time around, particularly John. As Kevin said, "that kid was the worst." At seven, he disliked the public-school kids because they were "quite dirty;" at fourteen, he was ready to get rid of the democratic right of labor unions to strike. I can only imagine what fascist stands he'll take at 21.

I'll just have to wait until this week's Netflix delivery.

now accepting scripts

2007-04-20T10:23:00.000-07:00

Part of having a child, I think, is the freedom to put them in a video in which they curse and drink. Kevin and I have no doubt little BDR will be the next cursing baby phenomenon. Her father's rapidly disintegrating vocabulary will prove an invaluable asset in this exploit, I am sure.

Isn't this why we have a video camera?

dvd town

2007-04-20T10:01:00.000-07:00

Thanks to the surprising bounty of the Mountain View Public Library, and to the good folks over in Los Gatos at Netflix, we're overflowing with television-watching goodness.

Which is good, since when BDR crashes the party, the TV will be persona non grata.

Also, I'm semi-retired, and, really, have you ever tried knitting to NPR? Not only does it automatically age you 35 years, but you get really sleepy too.

So, what's in our DVD cache? Borat, for one. And though we've seen it already, it was totally worth renting it again if only to hear Kevin's shriek when opening the Netflix envelope: "what the hell is this shit?" (If you haven't seen it, the DVD is packaged to look like it's been pirated. Kevin's super sense of perception obviously fell for the ruse.)

Actually, the rental was worth it for two scenes: a deleted scene at a supermarket, and the Jay Leno/Borat/Martha Stewart bed making scene from the Tonight Show.

In the first, an uncommonly patient supermarket manager answers Borat's questions about products in the store. Unfortunately, every question Borat asks is "what's this?" and every answer is, "cheese." And the supermarket manager answer this question well over 30 times. Without getting angry.

I suspect he has a toddler at home.

In the second, Martha Stewart valiantly attempts to make a bed, while Borat tries to get into bed (and possibly her pants) and Jay Leno stands off to the side as if to avoid lawsuits.

At one point, Borat asks Martha if all three of them will get into bed; Martha replies, "oh, no. That's kinky." To which Jay questions, "Martha, have you had two men before?" Martha's outrage at Jay's question is a little forced, if you ask me - like perhaps she has something to hide - but she, of course, denies it.

At which point Borat takes off his underwear.

Earlier in the week, we watched Half Nelson. Kevin's two comments about the movie are, first, "I don't think I can ever listen to Broken Social Scene without thinking about Half Nelson," and, second, "Oh, did Half Nelson clean himself up?" after seeing Ryan G0sling in a preview with Anthony Hopkins. I should note that the character is not named Half Nelson, or even Nelson for that matter.

Half Neslon also is notable in that Jerri Blank's mother is Half Nelson's mother. And she's still an alcoholic, but a 60's- style radical one.

Speaking of Strangers with Candy, perhaps the most exciting find at the MVPL was season 3 and season 5 of Curb Your Enthusiasm. (Recall that Stew the Meatman plays Larry's dentist in season 3.) With my own collection, I have about 30 hours of misanthrope to rock.

the leather anniversary

2007-04-17T09:46:00.000-07:00

A few memories from three years ago:

wedding

16 photos

thespianism at its finest

2007-04-14T14:37:00.000-07:00

Snakes on a Plane might be the best movie I've ever seen.

At first, I was a little disappointed that it took over 20 minutes to introduce either snake, or plane, or Samuel L. Jackson.

But, the action quickly made up for it. Specifically, when the snakes bit the private parts of the couple getting it on. And the wiener of the dude using the bathroom. And the eyeball of the fat woman. And the tongue of the woman who was trying to use the barf bag.

Yeah, it was awesome.

one last peek in the oven

2007-04-09T14:51:00.000-07:00

Look, you wouldn't photograph well if you were jammed into a pelvis, either. (For the record, that's BDR's head.)

At this point, taking a peek in the oven seems to run the risk of spoiling the soufflé. In our case, that would be learning if BDR's really Hermione Juliette or Linus Charles. Luckily, we had a great ultrasound tech who told us when to avert our eyes, and BDR remains as neuter as a Fisher Price man.

Yet I buy only blue yarn...

Are we having a baby or a Smurf?

In other news, BDR's a total porker. Healthy, but a porker.

.

dear writers of 24

2007-04-04T13:21:00.000-07:00

Pretty please . . .

. . . more Jack Bauer.

(Also, not to be picky, but I'm pretty sure the National Security Advisor isn't a cabinet position. Sorry, Karen Hayes.)

Big Sur

2007-04-03T23:13:00.000-07:00

Although it's a few weeks early, KJ and I celebrated our third anniversary by taking a trip to Big Sur. We'd been to the area during our trip to California in 2005, but we were excited to return.

See how excited we are to be in Big Sur!

We were excited. Then we started our trip, which was pockmarked with luck both very very good and very very bad.

Bad Luck #1: Destruction of Jetta on CA-85
Not 15 miles from home, we ran over some road debris on one of my least favorite highways. I wasn't exactly paying attention, but Kevin seems to think it was a "clay pot" or "some glass;" it apparently was about the size of a rugby ball, though, and it crashed underneath the car with a mighty boom.

We were able to pull off the road at the next exit with a sickening grinding sensation under the floorboards. When we pulled into a neighborhood to check out the damage, we saw a random piece of plastic hanging down, dragging along the ground. Groovy!

Bad Luck #2: Attempt to Discern Amount of Destruction to Jetta
We'd actually pulled off the highway at the perfect time; any later and we'd been in a much more rural area. As it was, we were in a fairly industrial area populated by many, many, many mechanics.

Alas, it was Sunday.

And so I don't exaggerate when I say that we drove past over a dozen car repair shops - not to mention service stations - before we'd given up hope of finding something by pure luck. But perhaps luck was on our side, since on the corner where Kevin had decided to turn around stood a Shell station with open garage doors. Hallelujah! And while they weren't open, some suggestive pregnant-belly petting and pathetic looks from yours truly garnered us some time with a mechanic, who informed us:
(1) we have an oil leak (which we knew about);
(2) we were OK to drive.

Snap! Back on the road.

Good Luck #1: Free bassinet
Just moments after we'd received the good news, and as we were looking for the highway on-ramp, we received a call from friends offering us their not-really-ever-used bassinet. Excellent! Perhaps we can free up an extra six inches or so in the bedroom.

I think they might have been a little shocked by our willingness to take it off their hands, though.

Joe: You can take a look at the pictures and see if you like it; it might not be your style.
Kevin: I can't imagine what it would have to look like for us not to want it.

Bad Luck #3: A chilling realization...
We'd assembled our new mansion-tent and had started filling it with the dozens of pillows I'd brought when I realized I had forgotten to pack the sleeping bags.

Kevin's smiling on the outside, but shivering on the inside

Good Luck #2: We have a down blanket in the car
For emergencies. Like early-morning basketball ticket distributions.

Good Luck #3: The restaurant in the park where we're camping sells Blue Bunny ice cream - cotton candy flavored, to boot!

Bad Luck #4: When we go to get ice cream, after waiting so patiently, the store is closed due to "lack of staff."
Amy, defeated: I'm not sure what lesson I'm supposed to learn from this.

From here, though, it was smooth sailing. We saw tons of wildlife: turkeys, harbor seals, sea otters, lots of tidepool creatures, and many birds that we can never identify.

McWay Waterfall at Julia Pfeiffer Burns State Park

Hauled-out seals at Point Lobos State Preserve

Sea bird eating a starfish at Point Lobos State Preserve

Tidepools at Asilomar State Beach

Pacific coastline at Asilomar State Beach

Julia Pfeiffer Burns State Park

Point Lobos State Preserve

Asilomar State Beach

I win...by a technicality

2007-04-03T22:51:00.000-07:00

National Champion, 2007: Florida a.k.a. Puppy Goo-Goo

Kevin: You know, if it weren't for the Fetal Tarheelification Program, BDR would have won, since Florida was the overall Number 1 seed.

Yes, yes. I suppose he is correct.

With this attitude, why not just put the baby in a ~~J.J. Reddick commemorative jersey~~?

(Editor's note: last phrase has been struck at the request of our soon-to-be-hired marriage counselor.)

best bracket ever

2007-04-01T11:56:00.000-07:00

I've really been cleaning up this year in the NCAA tournament. I had three of my final four teams (while BDR had two and KJ had - eek! - one), and have the championship game as well.

Now, I need the strung-out looking Joakim Noah to pull through for me.

In Sydney Bristow news, the Final Four consisted of Puppy Goo Goo (Florida) taking down Chapel Hill (UCLA), while BDR (Ohio State) defeated the Pacific Ocean (Georgetown).

Thus, the championship game: Puppy Goo Goo versus BDR. As Kevin said, "If BDR can take on the Pacific Ocean, Puppy Goo Goo should be a piece of cake for her."

We're taking requests for next year's entries: a certain Chicago-based accountant already has nominated himself. I can only hope he doesn't have to be Duke. Or Purdue.

baby crafts

2007-03-29T21:56:00.000-07:00

A few of the baby crafts that have been finished this week. More details can be found here.

Baby Raglan Sweater. Kevin said it would be "a little much," by which he meant, "just a little this side of Baby J.Crew for our style," but the fact is it was really easy to knit. So, here it is: baby's first prep-school sweater.

BDR's ready for Middlebury - or at least Madeline is!

Curtains for BDR's room. I cannot stress enough how much of a hack job this is. I'm pretty sure I have little to no business operating a sewing machine. Anyway, we have some functioning curtains.

It kind of looks off-center here, but Kevin ensured that his super-special Simpsons' clock was centered over the curtains.

coincidence?

2007-03-27T16:23:00.000-07:00

Is it just me, or does 24's Gredenko sound a lot like Strong Bad?

And Noah Daniels might be one of my favorite characters ever. Man, he's insane. (Although, you have give credit to Fox's surprising restraint in never naming what Middle Eastern country's getting nuked. My money's on Iran. Kevin concurs.)

2007-03-26T16:52:00.000-07:00

Bye, Bye Rameses.

someone's on Spring Break

2007-03-26T16:32:00.000-07:00

BDR's wish list

2007-03-24T15:34:00.000-07:00

BDR asked us to pass along her wish list.

baskeball: a family affair

2007-03-24T13:21:00.000-07:00

It seems like every member of the Davis-Ross family was in a cranky mood last night during the Carolina-USC game.

Sure, the game left a lot to be cranky about, since Carolina seemed incapable of getting either a rebound or a basket in the first half. Kevin expressed his frustration by paying bills and looking at our taxes. BDR expressed her frustration by staging a sit-in in my ribcage. I expressed my frustrating by knitting yet another superfluous sweater for BDR.

Luckily, things turned around in the second half. Kevin rejoined us on the futon to watch the game, and BDR started furious, spasmodic cheering. I continued knitting the superfluous sweater for BDR.

An aside: Watching this series has been a bit of a labor of love for me. Kevin's been in rare form, easily ired by seemingly slight offenses. He really can't handle the Charles Schwab commercials (WHY DO THEY NEED TO BE ANIMATED? THIS IS STUPID! THIS DOESN'T MAKE ME WANT TO USE CHARLES SCHWAB ANY MORE THAN I DID BEFORE!) and the UPS commercials (THESE ARE THE WORST THINGS EVER! UGH! I HATE THESE COMMERCIALS! I HATE THIS GUY!).

And please don't get him started on that Roy Williams Coca-Cola commercial, in which his mother started taking in extra ironing and cleaning so he could have a dime to buy a bottle of soda with his friends. This just really pushes him over the edge.

All I can say is thank goodness Dick Enberg was not one of the commentators; Kevin might hate Dick Enberg as much as that other Dick. Kevin said, "for Dick Enberg, it's not a basketball game; it's a Norman Rockwell painting."

This was quickly followed up by, "$18.25? That's a year, not a pizza price," after ordering our dinner.

smarty pants

2007-03-22T16:06:00.000-07:00

Did you know? Kids really know everything!

Kindergartner: What are you going to name your baby?
Amy: (divulges real names for boy and girl that remain top secret)
Other Kindergartner: Those aren't very good names.

Another Kindergartner: Sometimes people look fat, and sometimes people look pregnant.
Amy: Yep, it's true.
Another Kindergartner: Are you fat or pregnant?

Pre-schooler: What's in your stomach?
Amy: What do you think is in my stomach?
Pre-schooler: A ball.
Amy: Close. A baby.
Pre-schooler: No, it's a ball. (Then proceeds to try to stick his grubby little paws up my shirt, as if to pull out the beach ball I have hidden underneath.)

(While given sample directions for a 5-paragraph persuasive essay)
Amy: So, say you think college basketball is the best thing on Earth, and one of the reasons you think it's so great is because it has the best coaches. So, you need to come up with three reasons why college basketball coaches are so great.
Fourth Grader: You know, it's called NCAA basketball.

I also enjoy when kids tell me I say things incorrectly, which kind of happens a lot.

(While talking about ice cream.)
Amy: I like caramel syrup on my ice cream. (Pronounced: KAR-uh-mel)
Entire Fourth Grade Class: Ha, ha! It's caramel. (Pronounced: KAHR-mul.)
Amy: Um, no, actually it's KAR-uh-mel. You can look it up in the dictionary.

Amy: Please get out your research projects. (Pronounced Ri-SURCH)
Entire Classes, several grade levels: Ha, ha! It's research. (Pronounced: REE-surch.)
Amy: Hmm. Either is right. But, I say research.

The whole thing with pronunciation is particularly interesting, as one of the most treasured books in the Davis-Ross household is Charles Harrington Elster's The Big Book of Beastly Mispronunciations. We call it "The Beastly," and have on occasion been known to say, "to The Beastly," with finger outstretched, as if we were headed "to the Bat Cave" or "to the Mystery Machine."

The Beastly is awesome, if only because the author has limited tolerance for some common mispronunciations. For example, see this hilarious take on mischievous:

Mischievous: MIS-chi-vus. Three syllables, stress on the first.

Mischievous is subject to two beastly mispronunciations: mis-CHEE-vus and, more often, mis-CHEE-vee-us. Both place the accent on the wrong syllable; the latter adds an erroneous syllable to the word. OED 2 (1989) says, "The stressing on the second syllable was common lin literature until about 1700; it is now dialectical, vulgar, and jocular." Merriam-Webster's Collegiate Dictionary 10 (1993) dubs the second-syllable accent "nonstandard" but notes that "our pronunciation files contain modern attestations" of mis-CHEE-vee-us "ranging from dialect speakers to Herbert Hoover." That's not much of a range, in my humble opinion. If Hoover is your model for cultivated speech, I feel for you. I'll stick with the majority of educated Americans who say MIS-chi-vus, thank you. (Elster 1999: 257-258)

The Beastly even has its own special place, in the pile of baby books. Somehow, it seems appropriate.

innate basketball wisdom

2007-03-18T22:47:00.000-07:00

We've made it through the first weekend of March Madness with brackets somewhat intact. BDR's in the lead, one point ahead of Kevin, and two points ahead of me.

Which means that I'll probably lose because I said Gonzaga would beat Indiana.

Calbert Cheaney: Hubba Hubba

There are at least three things wrong with my choice. First, it's Gonzaga, which I really don't like at all. Second, it's Indiana, which I should have selected based on my alumni status and childhood crush on Calbert Cheaney. Third, the last time I picked against Indiana against my better judgement was in 2002, when they made a run to the National Championship before being downed by the awesome power of Juan Dixon.

(Also in 2002, I picked Duke to beat Indiana. But don't blame me! I was just a new Tar Heel, and my childhood crush on Christian Laettner was MUCH stronger than that on any Hoosier.)

The source of premarital counseling: my crush on CL.

But let's focus on the positive: BDR's a basketball savant!

Our Sydney Bristow tournament is shaping up as well. Some interesting Sweet Sixteen match-ups include: BDR (Ohio State) versus Troy McClure (Tennessee), Jack Bauer (Memphis) versus Borat (Texas A&M), and Kevin's postdoc adviser (Oregon) versus Dr. Manhattan (UNLV), the oddly sexual hero of The Watchmen.

My favorite match-up is Stanford McStanford (Pitt) versus Chapel Hill (UCLA). Stanford McStanford was a personality I'd developed to convince Kevin to move to California; he would periodically email Kevin with blurbs about the area, like, "it's only 300 miles to Yosemite!"

I'm hoping Chapel Hill rips Stanford McStanford limb from limb, as a sign that perhaps we'll be heading back.

mmm...chicken

2007-03-18T22:39:00.000-07:00

So, Kevin and I kind of have this minor addiction to rotisserie chicken. We get one every week. Today, we stalked down some fresh-from-the-spit chicken at Whole Foods.

The problem started in November, when I was watching a lot of America's Test Kitchen on PBS. They started making chicken and dumpling soup, and went on and on about how their tests proved that dark meat was the way to go for making soups.

It was all downhill from there: I realized I could buy the chicken, eat the breasts and keep the dark meat for all kinds of chicken noodle soups.

This was also about the time we started singing that "chicken noodle soup" song almost every day, since I was making chicken noodle soup almost every day.

Anyway, it's really gotten pretty bad. At first, I thought it was just some weird pregnancy craving, but now that Kevin's on board too, I have to think they've somehow doped the birds to induce cravings. Seriously, I could go for some right now.

Point Reyes National Seashore

2007-03-17T16:07:00.000-07:00

Kevin and I avoided the weekend crowds (and managed to get some unseasonably clear weather) by heading to Point Reyes National Seashore Thursday and Friday nights.

Perhaps most interesting about this trip was how delightful our weather was - for the "foggiest and windiest place on the Pacific Ocean," Point Reyes was clear and sunny all day Thursday and Friday. Only Saturday did we get a taste of the fog and wind, which promptly sent us running home.

We'd ostensibly gone to the park to do some whale watching, but it turns out that neither of us have the attention span required to spot a whale in the vast ocean. Whales were there, to be sure - before we'd arrived at the spotting station, they'd seen several dozen - but our capacity to stare at the vast blue expanse was not.

Kevin attempts to spot a gray whale

(This sets me straight on something I'd been wondering, which is whether I'd dig bird watching. As I suspected, I don't have the patience. I like looking at birds, but only when they're right in front of me.)

We did see a ton of wildlife, including:

White deer. Are these just albino deer? It's not clear, but it seems obvious why they would need protection.
Elk. There was an elk ahead of us on our trail Friday morning, which was pretty cool. Saturday morning, we were awoken by several elk making a noise that sounded a lot like some punk teenagers making "spooky ghost noises."
Seals. I'm pretty sure they're harbor seals, all hauled out in this cove.
Elephant seals. (Kevin: After Ano Nuevo, I don't need to go take a look.) We saw them from a few hundred feet away, which was good enough for us.

Jellyfish, starfish, and sea anemones. We hit a tidepool, about an hour too late.
Sea lions. Again, they were all hauled out.
Quail. Did you know that quail sound like they're laughing at you?

Brownish banana slugs. I couldn't resist poking them.
Also: Tons of water fowl, tons of birds of prey, some jack rabbits, and some horses.

Friday night at the campsite, we heard what later were identified as raccoons. Apparently there's a massive problem with aggressive raccoons at our camp, and we were given permission to throw pebbles at them, should they appear. Alas, we didn't see any.

I also should add that our tent is broken. Someone had a problem with his zipper at Crater Lake, and it was only exacerbated by this trip, to the extent that his door could not close. I was convinced that one of these aggressive raccoons would enter the tent in the middle of the night. Could you imagine anything more horrific? I could seriously handle many other creatures - spiders, insects, even birds or field mice. But a raccoon? Yikes!

Technically, this was a backpacking trip, but really we just had a 3-mile hike-in to our campsite. BDR and I were fine on the backpacking portion of the hikes, and during the other 10 miles we logged, but the same could not be said for our sleeping experience. Next weekend's trip to the Redwoods will come with many, many more pillows.

Point Reyes National Seashore

78 photos

the madness of March

2007-03-14T14:02:00.000-07:00

National Champion, 2007?

Last night, Kevin and I filled out and compared our brackets. It turns out we have pretty similar picks - although Kevin's going on the Texas A&M bandwagon and has Carolina and Florida in the championship game, while I'm sticking by my boy Greg Oden and have Ohio State in the championship game, against Florida.

Naturally.

Also, it seemed only appropriate that BDR filled out a bracket of her own. Since she won't be able to make her own picks until 2009, we had to go with the professionals. That's right: BDR's bracket is just the favorites, with a few caveats: Duke must lose its first game, and Carolina must win the National Championship. It's all part of our Fetal Tar-Heelification Program (FTP).

In marginally more interesting basketball news, it's also time for our Sixth Annual Sydney Bristow Tournament of Champions. Quick backstory: in 2002, Kevin and I decided to hold a semi-pop-culture playoff of sorts, using the NCAA tournament as our vehicle. Basically, we pick 64 or 65 "things" that represent the past year, plop them in the brackets linked to the real NCAA teams, and watch our history beat itself to death.

Last year, for example, our Final Four consisted of: His Dark Materials (UCLA), Tom Kruse, Inventor of Hoveround (LSU), Charles Guiteau (Florida), and the 2006 U.S. Women's Curling Team, Calendar Edition (George Mason).

Which means, of course, that Charles Guiteau, the assassin of President Garfield, was our Sydney Bristow Champion. (We had just finished reading Sarah Vowell's Assassination Vacation.)

This year promises to be even more exciting! Really! Some entrants may be familiar to faithful readers, including BDR - who scored a sweet place as Ohio State, which is appropriate as Greg Oden is one of her fetal personalities.

Other highlights include: Ranger Kirk, Herschel Walker, Stephen Wade Chevrolet, IKEA Panzarottis, Classic Peanuts, Ice Bat, Killer Squirrels of Mountain View, Marky Mark (in The Departed), Julius Peppers, Jack Bauer, Angry rattlesnakes at Escalate National Monument, Elephant Seals, Beatrice Baudelaire, Wanda Sykes, Sexy Cylons, El Camino Real, Banana Slugs, HHR, Shaquila O'Neala/James LeBron, Butt Valley, and Borat.

Kevin and I have Puppy Goo-Goo taking it all. (I should add that Kevin picked Borat to trounce BDR in the Elite Eight. A father's love...)

Sunset Magazine Gardens

2007-03-12T18:38:00.000-07:00

Since we had a doctor's appointment this morning, I took the day off, dropped Kevin off at Stanford, and drove over to Menlo Park to take a look at Sunset Magazine's public gardens. I'd read about them in a few places and was really excited to pop in, but they were...meh.

Perhaps I was hindered by the fact that it was 80 degrees today, and my core body temperature has risen a few degrees or so. Yeah, it was sweltering. I even turned on the A/C in the car, and that's something I reserve for 90+ days.

I even contemplated getting into the pool when I got home from the gym, only to remember (1) I'm not sure where my swimsuit is; (2) my swimsuit probably doesn't fit; and (3) the only people who are at the pool during the day are the blue-haired set.

Instead, I ate some Easter candy.

Garden at Sunset Magazine

43 photos

Shoreline Park

2007-03-11T23:11:00.000-07:00

Kevin poses with the marsh (pre-sunburn)

Today, Kevin and I walked from our house to the San Francisco Bay - specifically, we took a leisurely (read: flat and paved) 6-mile jaunt to, around, and back from Shoreline Park in Mountain View.

On the way, we were sunburned. Hmm. Since this is my second sunburn in four days, I suspect it's probably time to look for some sunscreen.

View across SF Bay...with a great blue heron hiding on the docks

We saw some cool wildlife: lots of ducks and other aquatic birds, including a great blue heron that we harassed into flying for us. Unfortunately, we didn't see any burrowing owls.

Shoreline at Mountain View

15 photos

thanks a lot, Dick Vitale

2007-03-11T22:54:00.000-07:00

a vision of evil

Both Kevin and I groaned when we heard Dick Vitale name Carolina his national champion, as it is common knowledge that DICK VITALE ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS is wrong.

In other NCAA news, why are the pundits' brackets so lame? Everyone's Final Four is three number 1 seeds and one number 2...and their number 2 is Georgetown.

(In the interest of full disclosure, I guess my Final Four is pretty top-seed heavy, too. I guess that's what happens when you have teams like Florida and Ohio State and Carolina.)

springtime

2007-03-10T11:46:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I took almost 500 photos at Gamble Garden.

Gamble Garden 3- 9- 07

71 photos

house of lies

2007-03-09T19:31:00.000-08:00

I kind of like it when kids lie to me. Hmm. I should be more clear: I do not like it when kids tell obvious lies, like, "we're allowed to kick each other in the balls." I do like it, though, when kids tell the kind of lie where it's not clear they know they're even lying. Maybe they just have an active imagination, or they think they heard something but it was translated in their little brains incorrectly.

Anyway, I love conversations like these, brought to us by lies:

Arjun: I found a baby tarantula in my backyard.
James: What did you do with it?
Arjun: I took it to the Junior Museum, but they didn't want it, so I killed it, because I thought the mother would come back and kill me.
Amy: I once found a black widow spider in my garage, and it had an egg sack. I captured it and put it in a cage.
James: What happened to it?
Amy: Oh, it escaped.
Arjun: Well, you can't put a spider in a cage.
James: Did it bite anyone?
Amy: No, I think it just ran away.
James: Once, when I was walking through my yard, a preying mantis jumped up on me.
Arjun: Preying mantises are cannibals. They eat each other's heads off.
Amy: But only the women eat the men, right?
Arjun: Yeah. But Preying mantises can live without their heads.
James: Like chickens. They can live without their heads.
Amy: Really?
James: Yeah. Once, these scientists cut the head off of a chicken, and they kept it alive for over a year by feeding it in the tubes in its neck. And it could still talk, because it had its voice box, and it sounded like this (noise like a muffled rooster).
Amy: It lived for a year? Without a head? Where did you hear about this chicken?
James: On the Discovery Channel.
Amy: Did they talk about any other animals?
James: No, only the chicken.

There was just no reasoning with the kid. Apparently, he was a member of the Cult of the Headless Chicken. I asked several leading questions, like: don't living things need brains? But, apparently, they don't.

so, yeah, I have a problem with competition

2007-03-09T19:26:00.000-08:00

Should I feel guilty for wanting to kick the little bottom of a punk 9-year-old who challenged me to a game of paddle ball?

My first instinct is "yes," but keep in mind that he chose me as his partner because the thought the 7-month-pregnant woman would be easy to beat.

Also, this kid IS a total punk.

So, no, I don't feel guilty when I play to win against someone who's almost two feet shorter and 20 years younger than I am. The kid's got to learn that life's not fair sooner or later, and I might as well be the one to teach him that tough lesson.

Kalashnikovs and grenades and pot, oh my!

2007-03-06T22:02:00.000-08:00

I get a lot of kid's artwork, and most of it is of the sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows variety.

This, however, might be my favorite, given to me by a sixth grader who said, "I think you need to have this."

There's a lot of great stuff going on here, but my favorite might be that Assassin Rabbit is smoking what appears to be a big yellow joint. Either that, or he's sticking a forked tongue out at the world.

2007-03-06T21:57:00.000-08:00

Yum, yum.

the nuke-u-lar option

2007-03-06T15:56:00.000-08:00

The face of a man who just got out of a Chinese Prison.

I have a suspicion that Mr. Murdoch requires Jack Bauer to say "nuke-u-lar" as a way to say to America: "Hey, you know what? Here's someone you can respect and trust that doesn't say it correctly, so let's cut Bush II some slack, OK?" In other words, it's all part of his right-wing agenda.

I have to believe this is true, as, according to Jack Bauer's resume, he has a BA in English Lit from UCLA. Actually, it appears that nearly everyone at CTU earned some pansy degree from some overhyped university. This should give hope to English majors everywhere (or, at least, at Brown) that perhaps the humanities aren't dead.

But I digress. Jack Bauer is hot. BDR and I agree on this one.

banana slugs are surprisingly cool

2007-03-04T19:59:00.000-08:00

Saturday, we took a hike at El Corte de Madera Creek Open Space Preserve in the Santa Cruz mountains. It was a pretty decent hike: about 6 miles (or, perhaps 7.5, due to some "navigational issues") with a few hundred feet of gain over the course of the trails. The Preserve is mostly second- and third-growth redwoods, which was a nice change from our previous hikes in mountain/beach terrains.

Two key features of the hike stand out:

Banana slugs: they are what they sound like - large, yellow slugs, found all over the Santa Cruz Mountains, and for the first time by us this weekend.

Kevin demonstrates just how long the banana slugs are.

Tafoni sandstone formation: a geological oddity in the Santa Cruz Mountains, there are only two sandstone formations, and one is located at El Corte de Madera Creek. Once we got to the formation, we realized where we'd heard the term "tafoni" before - from our friend, Ranger Kirk, in describing sandstone formation at Arches.

Tafoni sandstone formation at El Corte de Madera Creek

Tafoni sandstone formation at Arches National Park

At this point, it is hard to avoid BDR's presence while hiking. Being pregnant has brought the added strain of extra weight (which is felt especially going uphill), the added clumsiness due to a new center of gravity (as if I needed another excuse to fall!), the double whammy of needing to drink more water AND needing to use the restroom more frequently (which is exactly as fun as it sounds! really!), and the added stares of bewilderment of passersby. Which led to this conversation:

Kevin: People must look at you and think you're hard core.
Amy: Maybe I am hard core.

I am not hard core. I think I have it in the back of my head that hiking while I can will either (1) help me have an earlier - but not preterm - labor, or (2) will help me have a crazyfast labor, like you see on TV, where a character feels her first contraction and suddenly the baby pops out. Either way, it's all coming up Milhouse.

El Corte de Madera Creek OSP

16 photos

if it's March, it must be basketball...

2007-03-04T19:39:00.000-08:00

Memo to Coach K: beating up Carolina star players will not prevent your team from sucking.

March might be my most favorite month of the year, especially when Duke starts losing clutch games.

I've kind of messed up our tournament viewing for this year, since I scheduled a backpacking trip to Point Reyes during the first weekend of the tournament. (This kind of throws a wrench in my year-long dream to start watching the tournament at like 6 a.m.) But, as Kevin has pointed out, this has been a lost basketball season. We don't get many ACC games, although we did seem to get a lot of Big 10 games in the networks' attempt to air every moment of Ohio State basketball.

Anyway, I think we will get a bunch of tournaments next weekend, which should be a small consolation. Besides, until I get that cool Dish Network watch-four-games-at-once set-up, I might never be satisfied.

in case of emergency...

2007-03-01T17:50:00.001-08:00

So, about 5 or so years ago I had a change in my attitude, which probably was the result of meeting Kevin and starting graduate school and just overall maturation. Anyway, I realized that it would just be easier to go through life making fun of it rather than being angry at it, which had been my modus operandi.

In other words, I'd let myself be amused rather than irritated by the ineptitude and differences of others. Like, for example, when I was (technically) hit by a car yesterday. Or all of those bad drivers, in general, except for when I'm kind of afraid I'll die.

Some exceptions do apply: I'm still kind of angry about Bush II. I'm also angry about intolerance. I get cranky when people don't recycle. I really don't like selfishness. And the mystery alarm has transitioned from curious to angry-up-the-blood status.

Anyway, here's an example of something that probably ought to irritate me, but that I find hilarious: the rules for plumbing repairs that our homeowner association mails out every month.

(If you're really curious - and who isn't?- click above to read the text)

What's truly hilarious about these rules aren't the rules themselves (which are pretty reasonable), but the protocol to be used "in an emergency situation," which is...exactly the same.

Because, really, don't you have 48 to 72 hours notice before your emergency plumbing problems arise?

yesterday, I was hit by a car (technically)

2007-03-01T16:30:00.000-08:00

Lest you think that my repeated rants about the amazing lack of driving aptitude in the Palo Alto/Mountain View area was without merit...

So here I am, walking around "pedestrian friendly" downtown Palo Alto, on my way to meet Kevin for dinner ahead of our birth class.

I cross a street at the crosswalk with the right of way (two things I admit I don't always do).

A car comes speeding toward me from the right. I figure the driver is going to make a right-turn-on-red at the light, so I angle myself to the right side of the crosswalk, so as to walk behind the car.

The car does NOT turn right-on-red, but instead kicks it into reverse and starts to (poorly) parallel park in what I should add is NOT a parking space.

As I am directly behind this car at this time, I am forced to scream (my choice - "oh my GOD!") and jump back. And, to be clear, I am "jumping back" into the line of traffic, as the light has changed and cars now are driving past/around me. Neither my scream, nor my pounding on the side of the car, alerted the driver that she was indeed about to plow me down.

All of this occurs after said car in question (a particularly hideous bright orange VW Bug) has grazed my hand going 3 MPH while parking.

Thus, the technical hit-by-car. Not to be confused with my actual hit-by-car, which occurred while I was in third grade, purchasing hot dogs for my mother at the local market, and running across a semi-busy road screaming "run for it."

the food of South Jersey - and IKEAs everywhere

2007-02-28T16:05:00.000-08:00

I'm going to preface this by saying that, in general, IKEA is a scary kind of place that Kevin and I try to avoid as we're certain we'll meet our death in a grisly car accident in its lawless parking lots.

(Or, we'll get lost wandering the showrooms and be found months later, trying to eek out a meager existence in one of the 200-square-foot apartments.)

(Or, we'll be mowed down by hostile and pregnant shoppers who demonstrate the same skills with a jumbo shopping cart as with their jumbo cars.)

But, we've had occasion to visit the yellow-and-blue behemoth once or twice since moving to California. It's just down the road from us, and, it's kind of the ideal place to purchase baby furniture, as it actually sells furniture that doesn't have frills or loops or lace or any of the other stuff that seems so hard to avoid.

Really, though, the main reason we go to IKEA is to eat - and not the fish or the Swedish meatballs and the lingonberry juice, but the panzarotti.

Click on pictures above to view larger images.

"Panzarotti?" you ask. "What are they? Sounds Italian."

As Kevin so aptly described, panzarotti are a food found within a 20-mile radius of his parents' home in South Jersey. And, apparently, IKEAs across the U.S. They're basically deep-fried pizza pockets, and taste exactly the way you'd think they would. (Loyal readers might be thinking to themselves, "sounds like a window to weight gain," and they would be correct.)

Kevin prides himself in being a kind of IKEA panzarotti connoisseur. A sample conversation may highlight his skills.

Kevin: They're really good today.
Amy: What makes them "better" or "worse"?
Kevin: How much they taste like they've been frozen. These taste really fresh.

Which, I suppose, is true. I find Kevin's skills all the more - er, impressive - given that he typically has no taste for freshness or post-frozen foods.

calling all engineers!

2007-02-25T22:06:00.000-08:00

Seriously, we need help. It's gone past "funny" and "amusing" to "really, truly annoying" and "inexplicably confusing."

If you have ANY suggestions for how to keep our oven buzzer from going off, please let us know. So far, we've been completely unable to figure it out.

If this keeps up, I'm going to fire bomb the kitchen.

they're back!

2007-02-23T19:20:00.000-08:00

The squirrels are on the attack, again.

I can't decide what I like better about the city where I live: the fact our squirrels are crazy mean, or the fact that our Congresswoman wants to make spanking a federal crime.